The Sneakiest Sin

There are many sins that fill our lives. However, there is one sin that we don't often think of because it is so prevalent in our world. It creeps up in our hearts and minds and makes us think it isn't there anymore.

This is the sin of bearing false witness, or in simple terms, lying.

Why do we lie?

 ...though the light has come into the world people have preferred darkness to the light because their deeds were evil.
And indeed, everybody who does wrong hates the light and avoids it, to prevent his actions from being shown up; ~John 3:19-20

No one wants their faults and failings to be seen by the world. These may either be our sins, but our falsehoods are typically found in another way: how we represent ourselves. We don't want people to think that we are different or do not belong to their group, so we act differently. Either we post about things in our statuses and tweets we never would say in person, or we speak differently based off of what crowd we are with. If we let ourselves come to the light, then we might be rejected.

This rejection is my greatest fear. After being rejected by so many people and never feeling "popular", I found myself desperately trying to be someone I wasn't. I started to tell stories about myself. I started to make myself sound more sassy, more sarcastic, more intense. I started to create this persona of a woman who took no one seriously and ruled the world, simply because I believed that that type of person was wanted by society. I started to sound like a real jerk, and I was actually proud of it. After all, I was becoming what I thought was the world's definition of perfection.

But I was sad and lonely as a result of these actions and stories. There was no good reason for me to lie about who I was, nor was there any reason to become anyone else.

My mother told me that I needed to stop this way of life. It was making my family miserable and life was not as good with all of these lies. So I went to confession and I started to acknowledge that I was going to strive to live as Jesus asked me to. And when I started to live in this way...something changed

But whoever lives the truth comes to the light,so that his works may be clearly seen as done in God ~John 3:21

What changes in the truth of Christ is how we are perceived. Our actions are not seen as our own but rather God is present in all of them. No longer do we live for ourselves, but rather we become consumed by God's love and shine as His light for the rest of the world.

Here's how I know this change is starting to happen to me....

For a long time, I had a huge crush on my best friend. I finally got around to telling him the whole story, which was probably not the best thing to do in terms of emotional chastity. Still, I felt like he deserved to know everything for how it was, not just how I wanted to present my feelings. I was expecting him to treat me completely differently, and I wasn't sure how either. Disregarding my fears, I told him the entire story with no hidden meanings, no new personas, no discrepancies or lies.

When I asked him what he got out of the story later, we ended up talking about God's love instead of my own. Apparently, the lessons that I had learned from our friendship translated to him as well. Instead of seeing me and my actions, he saw God's will and mercy and love.

When we are completely and totally ourselves, God is able to work through us. He has given each of us a unique position in His kingdom, but when we are not ourselves, we are unable to perform in that place. That is why lies are so hurtful. Not only do they take away from our relationships with other people, but they also distance ourselves from God's will. However, when we live in truth, we are able to live as God wants us to.

Overtime, we find ourselves living not for ourselves, but rather for God. We aren't seen for our Earthly selves anymore. As I am starting to grow in God's love, I have started to see the woman He created. The girl that I thought I was did not exist. The true me is not this earthly woman with a lot of sass. The true Felicity is an image of God. As an image of God, she is happy and sweet and silly and smart. She is not this dark person, nor is she a person that wishes pain on another person. This image of God's joy is what allows her to be loved, not the worldly representation she tries so hard to represent.

The sin of bearing false witness is creepy, and it is common to fall under its spell. However, remember that you are not just this little person on this planet. You are a child of God, designed to serve His people in a way that only you can. And if you are scared of anyone judging you, remember that you are not the one who is seen. God is present in your true self, and that is all you need to be loved by the world around you.