Hurting
Many people feel a bit of a slump in their second semester of sophomore year, and I was one of those people. Because I am so highly extroverted, I knew that I could not take on my highly stressful life alone. I started searching for a community that I felt like I could belong to. While I had community on my hall, a church group, and an exceptionally loving family at home, I still felt lonely. I did not really think there were very many people on campus that understood me as a person.I started to grow closer to a few people within Greek life within my hall. There were two Alpha Gams on my staff, several on my specific floor, and numerous friends of mine that would cut through Patton from time to time. They welcomed me with open arms and made me feel like I belonged with them, even though I had not gone through recruitment or even said anything about becoming Greek. It was the last thing most of my friends would have expected. Still, the gears started turning in my heart, and I found myself looking up figures and finances of Greek life on my own.
The day that I finally told my friends that I wanted to go through recruitment was a big day for me. I remember my heart was beating quickly, but burning with delight as well. It was at my future Sis-Mom's desk shift, and her little (also one of my best friends) was with her. I can't exactly remember who started crying, but we were all so happy.
Sadly, I did not get to go through fall recruitment. I had been too scared to ask my parents, of my standing in other organizations, and being able to handle everything. There were some unavoidable circumstances as well, and I thought that I would be ok. I so wasn't ok.
On Bid Day, I drove off campus and locked myself in my mother's closet and clutched my childhood teddy bear, sobbing because I wanted to be celebrating with all of the other girls.
My friends reassured me that I was just as special to them, regardless of if I wore letters or not. With their love and support, I was able to feel better after about a week. I threw myself in to personal growth in that semester. I dedicated myself to my dance, my science, my current friends, my family, and my faith. Still, I felt like I was not being fully supported by the community that I had on this campus. I love all of my friends deeply, but I did not have one place to go at Belmont.
Hope
Then, on January 25th 2015, I received an email inviting me to Informal Recruitment with Alpha Gamma Delta. I remember breaking down in happy tears and calling my mom to ask her if it would be ok if I went through recruitment. She said, "You didn't in the fall and I thought it was stupid." So I went through recruitment, and I met the greatest women. On the day that I received my bid from my favorite resident, I couldn't think of anything else, not even my huge molecular biology exam the next morning. I was just so happy to be home with my sisters.The New Member period held a special place in my heart as well. There were only eight of us, so we were able to bond fairly quickly. Some were in my group fitness classes. Some were my residents. Some shared a similar major. Most importantly however, they shared my values and approached life in a similar way. After searching for a group of people that understood my worldview, and therefore me, I finally found them.
Home
So then, when I was finally initiated, I was overjoyed. Sadly, I had to sprint off to a performance after the ceremony, so I could not celebrate with them. Even still, I have a peace of mind and heart that tells me that I found my place, my people, my home, my sisters that God granted to me for when I can't be with Team Newton at home in Franklin.And how fitting is that our chapter is celebrating Alpha Gam week on the same week as my initiation! I love that I get to see my sisters all week, and I get to celebrate just how wonderful our sisterhood is. Thank you God for helping me find a home on earth in AGD.
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